Advice for Teenage Dating
From Adviceopedia
Advice for teenage dating revolves around a policy of taking things slowly and keeping your head as well as your heart in the game. Teen dating can be incredibly fun as long as you feel comfortable with your limits. Join the fluttering of butterflies in your stomach, with blushes, and shy kisses, and then you can learn valuable lessons to help you in your adult relationships as well.
Advice for Teenage Dating
Don't Move So Quickly
With teenage dating comes a lot of pressure, from dates, friends, movies, and peers. Don't second guess yourself when you're not ready to do something. Always be willing to speak up and say no when things are going too quickly. The basis of a healthy relationship is a respect for each other and for you. Take things slowly. There's no need to rush into that first kiss or losing your virginity.
Don't Date Someone Just to Rebel
It's sometimes tempting to date someone just to rebel against your parents. However, dating someone your parents disapprove of disrupts the trust in your relationship with your mom and dad. Once you disrupt it, you will have a hard time earning that trust back, and you may be rebuilding the relationship with your parents long after your relationship with the new guy or girl has ended. If your date or significant other doesn't realize he's "forbidden" and later finds out that he was simply being used to hurt your parents, you could be hurting an innocent person with genuine feelings for you.
Be Honest with Yourself and Your Date
If you go on a date or two with someone and you find that you're not interested in being more than friends, be honest and let her know that you don't wish to continue dating. Don't ignore him or shrug him off with, "I have plans" while just waiting for him to get the message. Be respectful of her feelings but be honest with yourself and your date about what you're looking for.
Treat Your Date with Respect
This goes for any kind of relationship. Don't date someone and then tell everyone what a bad kisser he is or divulge any personal information you may hear on the date. Even if you don't wish to continue dating, remember to treat her with the respect that you would appreciate. Sometimes it is a challenge not to be caught up in gossip, especially in such an exciting time as when you're just starting to date, but try not to spread negative information about your date around school.
If the Relationship Is Abusive, Get Out Now
While many things should stay quiet about a date, if the relationship turns abusive, do talk. Talk to your parents first about what is going on. Break up with your significant other while others are nearby. Any relationship that involves verbal, physical, or mental abuse should end. If he indicates that he'll have a tendency to be controlling or abusive when you're out on a first date, don't let there be a second date.
Know the Consequences
Do know the consequences of your actions. If you aren't sure, ask a trusted adult, whether it's a teacher, a parent, or a nurse. Be prepared to deal with those consequences. Having sex? Be responsible and use protection. Know there is still a chance of getting pregnant or catching an STD. Ask yourself how you would handle the consequences before you take off your clothes and determine if it's worth the risk.
Heartbreak Doesn't Last Forever
Sometimes a break-up feels like the end of life. It's not the end of anything except a chapter in your life. The pain that comes from breaking up is temporary. Remember that as you grieve, you'll be happy again. Someone else will love you. You will love someone else. Try giving yourself a deadline. When you hit that deadline, you have to put on a smile and go back to going to class, hanging out with your friends, and enjoying your life.
You Can Survive a Disagreement
While there are some things that can break a relationship, a simple disagreement doesn't have to. Don't yell or become passive-aggressive. Calmly state your side. Listen to your date's side. Work to compromise or agree to disagree and move past it. If it's a minor thing, it's okay not to agree. Fight fair. Listen to each other. The outcome may not matter as much as learning whether you can or cannot treat each other as equals in the face of a disagreement.
Analyze Cheaters
Is "once a cheater always a cheater" true? Maybe. Consider why someone you're interested in cheated. Was he cheated on first? Does she seem sorry she did it? If he seems remorseful and appears to have changed, dating him may be worth a shot.
Realize Love Is Blind and Maintain Perspective
When faced with advice for teenage dating, some young people will say that others don't understand their relationship because they aren't involved in it. While that is true, sometimes it's easy for outsiders—friends or family members—to see things that love may have made you blind to. Red flags, like controlling behavior, may be more obvious to someone else before it's obvious to you. Consider what your loved ones are saying before defensively dismissing it. If nothing else, you may be able to explain away signs that they misinterpreted.
Follow Your Head and Heart
Advice for teenage dating is abundant. Just be sure to follow your head and not only your heart. Don't allow yourself to get so swept away by the new relationship that you can't think rationally about it. However, don't over think things and stifle your heart. Life and love at any age are best when balanced.
